Kicked in the gut

Beau went to work this morning, like he does every Monday. After he had been there for a couple of hours, he recieved an IM from his supervisor.

They closed his office.

Once again, he is without employment.

4th of the 4th

Steph over at The Incurable Insomniac tagged me for this fun little meme. Go to your 4th photo file and choose the 4th picture, post it and explain what it is. Well, I don't really have photo files, so I went to the 4th page of my mySpace page and found the 4th photo there.

This is a picture of one of my dearest friends Cteev. I believe this is his senior High School pic. Circa 1986. Cteev was one of the original "Bohemites" back in good old Ventura County California. I met Cteev in the summer of 87, "pimping" alcohol outside of a liquor store in Ventura (for those of you unfamilar with the term "pimping"..in this context, it means trying to get someone to buy alcohol for you because you are under 21) Anyway, a couple of weeks later, another friend of mine took me to the house his boyfriend was living in at the time. He was living with a family of 6, plus a few other "street urchins" Lo and behold, there was Cteev, living in the house as well. We became the tightest of friends from there on out. Even going so far as to become engaged. After we broke up, we stayed close, actually I do believe we became even closer. He was one of the loves of my life. Cteev contracted HIV in the late 90's and on October 23rd 2001, a blood clot found its way to his heart, and he lost his battle.

OMG..... it seriously just occured to me.

He died 7 years ago today.

Wow.

A case of the Ruttles

I go to work, I come home, I feed the cats, have dinner,I play video games or I watch T.V. Blather, rinse, repeat.

Then the weekend comes. I feed the cats, do laundry , dishes etc... Have dinner, feed the cats again, Play video games or watch T.V.

I think about weekends while at work, and think about work on the weekends.

Stuck in a serious rut and don't know how to get out of it. I know there are other things I could be, SHOULD be doing. I'm just so drained that I cannot seem to get motivated. I want to come back as a pampered and well loved house cat. Sleep, play, eat, repeat. Yeah, that's the life.

The perils of being a crazy cat lady

So, I have this "pride" of cats that live in the neighborhood. They are here much of the time, because being the crazy cat lady that I am, I feed them, regularly. Every morning, and in the evening when I get home from work, they are there, waiting for me. I don't want to go into how many there are, because I really don't want to see the number myself.

Anyway, last weekend, one of the mother cats (she has 4 kittens) was injured badly.(She is in the picture here, near the center of the photo, the patchwork Calico) We think the back half of her body was run over by a car. She lost the use of her back half entirely. She has been dragging herself around with her front legs only. We called the police, and an officer came to the house, he was going to help us catch her so we could take her to OSU animal hospital. Well, who knew a 2 legged cat could run so damn fast!!! Our neighbor, who feeds them on occasion as well, called Animal Control on Tuesday. Well, even they couldn't catch her. So, she has been dragging herself around like that for an entire week.

My husband, Beau, saw her this morning and called me to let me know she was in the front, dragging herself to bathe in the sunshine. I went out side about 2 hours later, and saw her lying in the grass. Upon closer inspection, I discovered the inevitability that we knew was coming. The poor little mama kitty had died. Heart broken, I found a plastic bag and a small box and lifted her from her happy sunny final resting place and put her empty vessel in the box. Now, she is happy and whole once again and chasing blue-jays under the trees in our backyard. At least, that's what I am telling myself. She was a tough little cat. Over the summer she had been attacked by a hawk and had a big chunk of the front of her neck torn out. I didn't think she would survive that. But she did, and she had 4 cute fluffy mouths to feed shortly thereafter. Her kittens, while not fully weaned, are big enough to eat dry cat food on their own. Thank goodness for that, or I would be nursing kittens around the clock. ( Oh, no, seriously, I would have done it too.) It is emotionally draining to have to clean up the debris left behind by the circle of life, but I had to be strong and take care of it. Then, I had to break the sad news to my neighbor. With tears in his 80 year old eyes, he said "Thank you , friend" I just smiled and told him to take a nap and think about her chasing those damned blue-jays." He smiled and nodded and closed his door, and I walked off with the box and came home. That was about 30 minutes ago.

It's Johnny's birthday.....

Happy Birthday Johnny L. We still miss you.

Slightly disjointed thoughts and ramblings

Exactly when did this government lose it's way? When did our elected officials forget that they work for the taxpayer? When did "Position of Power take the place of "Position of responsibility"? The governmental leaders of this country have a responsibilty to serve it's people. Not the other way around.

The masses have been slowely brainwashed to reveal their necks to the government. "For the good of the people" they spout, while all the while going for the jugular to take every last right, every last shred of freedom and every last penny away from us. For. Our. Own. Good.

They have kept us just on the edge of panic. Dangling "Death is only a finger away" since the 50's. "Listen to US! We are the only ones that can save you!!" McCarthy said that free thinkers were communists, George W. calls us terrorists. I grew up with such messages screaming from every corner of the country. "America, Love it or Leave it." "You are either for us, or against us."

G.W. was caught on film saying "This isn't a dictatership, but it would be easier if it were."(insert familiar condescending smirk here) Am I the only one that was truly enraged and mortified by this Freudian slip? Keeping the American people, frightened and on the verge of poverty. Only granting us what the government thinks we need. Isn't that the definition of communism? "Don't question, just do as we tell you and everything will be OK."

This unbelievable joke of a presidency has never taken it's role seriously. Like a bratty child, "Well I got away with that...lets go one step further." Oppression in small doses. Like a slow acting drug, hoping we won't notice the effect until it's too late. Privacy violations are now in place For.Our. Own.Good. Criticizm of our president in considered a terrorist act. Helmet laws, seatbelt laws, smoking bans......For. Our. Own.Good. Right? More like conditioning the American people. Conditioning us to get used to being told how to live our lives.

Too many of us are content to shrug it off "Well, that's just how it is."

Changes have to be made....or is it already too late?