Long overdue update

Well, here it is mid October and I am just getting around to posting again. Hard to know where to begin really.

Since I lost my job in March I have been on unemployment. I had been seeking employment here in the Leavenworth area, but could find nothing that would pay enough for us to live on. Sometime in June, Beau and I began to toy with the idea of moving to Oklahoma. It wasn't really meant to be a serious discussion. Just more of a passing comment. But, just for gits and shiggles, Beau talked to one of his bosses about their Oklahoma offices and would there be any work for him down there. Again, not really expecting a serious discussion. But lo and behold, it just so happened that the District Supervisor for the OK offices had just been fired and they needed a good replacement. Really?? Hmmm. "What are the chances you would consider me?"

Turns out the chances were better than good and the higher ups were absolutely thrilled about the prospect. They have a great deal of respect and admiration for him and just about jumped at the chance. So, ok... now we really ARE moving to OK. My best friend and his family live in Stillwater OK (Which is what prompted the first discussion to begin with.) So, it only made sense for us, that if we are moving all the way to OK, living in Stillwater was the only way to go. So we put the house up for sale and set out to find a new house in Stillwater. That was the beginning of August. Since then we have packed up most of our stuff, gotten rid of our sofa and loveseat and crossed our fingers everyday that this would be the day we got "the phonecall". We have had several people looking, but so far no reasonable offers. We have done a lot of painting and redoing of floors and general maintenance to make the place more appealing, but so far, the right people have not found the house yet. Or the house has not, as of yet, found them.

Upon our trip to Stillwater in August, we found the house of our dreams. (Well, of the the small reasonable realistic dreams anyway.) It is a really cool looking 2 bedroom 4 bath (yes, I said 4), with a kitchen to die for and 424 square feet of mostly unfinished space upstairs. I know this sounds more like a nightmare than a dream, but thee is just something about this house that we fell head over heels in love with. The snag, we have to get our house sold before we can even think about bidding. Or otherwise put in a Contingent upon sale clause in the contract.

Well after we got home, we deliberated, and decided to go ahead and put in the contingency bid. So I called our realtor, she got the paperwork together, we sent the earnest check and not 2 seconds after pushing the send button on her fax machine to send us the contract, her colleague walked into her office and stated "Oh, did you hear, that house on Will Rogers just went under contingency." We had been snaked out!!!!!! By another contingent!!! *sigh*

Broken hearted and with tears in my eyes, I called Beau and told him of this. Oh well, to be honest, we really needed that $500.00 earnest money to pay bills anyway. But, that was so not the point. Looking back, it would not have worked anyway, as here we are 2 full months later and still no offers on our current home.

Oh but wait there's more! About 2 weeks ago or so, I got an email from our OK realtor. "There were some title problems with the house you guys wanted, and the buyers cannot wait for them to fix it. They backed out. The current owners are going to get the problem fixed before they put it back on the market." The house is waiting for US!!! This is the second time a buyer has backed out. So the house KNOWS who is supposed to live there!! But, we are still in the same boat, "no selly no buyee". But, the traffic of lookers has picked up significantly. I suppose it is just a matter of time before the house picks its new owners.

Meantime, Beau's bosses need him to start work, so they have sent him to OK for 2 weeks. 2 WHOLE WEEKS!!! They made arrangements for a hotel, and he can visit with our friends on the weekend. That way he won't get too lonely and he can do his laundry too. But I hate this. He left this morning at 10. I didn't think I was going to, but as soon as he drove away, I started to cry. I am going to miss him so much. Luckily I have returned to working. I got a job a couple of weeks ago, just in the nick of time as my unemployment ran out. I sell carpet. I really enjoy this job too, which kinda sux because I know I cannot keep it. Oh well. We do what we gotta do in this life to take care of ourselves.

One more thing before I sign off. We got a dog. A miniature Beagle. We call her Daisy. She will be a great companion for me until my Angel comes home. Everyone, continue to send out good vibes that this house will find its new owners soon. I can't deal with this limbo shit anymore.We just want to be able to move on with our lives. It that too much to ask??!

Homeward bound

Well, I just booked a round trip flight to Oxnard. I couldn't be more excited about it!!! Unfortunately my hubby cannot go with me and that makes us both very sad. But, I get to see my mom and dad, and I was in so much denial about how much I have missed them. Not to mention the kids! My niece and nephews. My older brothers 3 kids. Shandi, the oldest, and the only girl, will be 16 in June. Joshua, the middle, turned 14 in October and Nathan, the baby, just turned 12 in April.

When I was still living in Cali, I was these kids secondary caregiver. That is to say, I was the daycare. I took care of them while my brother and sister in law went to work each day. I changed their diapers, I made their breakfasts and lunches and I felt as though I was making a difference in their lives. Shandi was only 5 when I left California. Now she is about to turn 16. I have missed so much of their lives. 10th birthdays, lost teeth, first report cards, first crushes, baseball and basketball games and swim meets. The more i think about this, the more sad I become. I am not unhappy with my life now. I love my husband with all my heart and he loves me. We have built a great life together, and I am looking forward to all that lies ahead. But, I have always regretted missing them grow up. Those kids are so much a part of my heart. I cannot imagine what it must be like to have kids of my own. I will probably implode. :-)

Hopefully I will know what it means very soon. The oldest, Shandi, could not pronounce my name when she was growing up, so it came out "Deedee". This is what they all call me, and always have. Though they spell it "Dede". So Aunt Dede it was, and is. Anyway, I can't wait to see them. If I win the lottery I am moving back to Cali. Unfortunately that it what it would take. It costs a fortune to live there now. So I am stuck here in the midwest. Kansas of all places. Who would have thought that this Valley Girl would end up in Kansas??

Anyway, I will leave on the 2nd of July and return on the 10th. I am so excited about this trip, that part of me is already sad about coming back. I'm a weird.

My exciting life... a day's review

Woke up to the thunder clap.
Stumbled to the bathroom to pee.
Stumbled to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee...one sweet and low with milk.
Went down to the living room to watch the news for a bit.
Started a load of laundry.
Made the bed.
Took a shower.
Switched the laundry, then decided to rearrange the bedroom closet. It looks good!
Sorted through my socks and chonies, throwing out the old and worn out.
Much to my chagrin I have a revelation that my husband is right, socks do fit better if you fold them rather than ball them. Besides, I also discovered that if you leave socks in a ball long enough, it stretches out the elastic, and then you have to throw them away. But mostly, I just hate to admit he was right.

*sigh*

Chatted with Steph for a few minutes.
Put away more laundry... started the last load (it is drying now).
Ate some lunch (sammich and cheesy rice washed down with a grape soda).
Now typing this boring blog entry while also watching/listening to the Ellen show. WOW, someone found this lady's cat after 7 years!! Ellen gives the lady some new cat toys to take home to her long lost pussy.

Future plans:
Put the dishes away.
Put away the last load of laundry.
Vacuum the carpets.
Watch Oprah.
Wipe down various surfaces.
Start dinner.
Greet hubby home from work.
Eat dinner.
Watch hubby play Pokemon video game.
Go to bed.

I just can't stand all the excitement. Now, I have no idea what I will do tomorrow. If anyone has any suggestions please let me know.

Rain today, then cleared... then rained again

I awoke this morning to a very loud crash of thunder. Not the best way to wake up, but I do love a good T-Storm. OK, so maybe I am a little weird, but I am a bit of a severe weather junkie. T-Storms, blizzards, hail storms and yes even Tornadoes. I know tornadoes tend to scare the hell outta people. With good reason. This weekend last year several devastating tornadoes swept through Leavenworth county and the surrounding areas causing a great deal of destruction. Of course I wouldn't want anything like this to happen again.

I think I just enjoy the energy that comes from storms like this. Just keep them in open fields away from people! So, anyway it has been raining all day so far, and the forecast calls for more rain, perhaps even into tomorrow.

It's so green outside, and everything looks so clean and crisp. Oh and the smell! Sweet and earthy. I wish it could be bottled up and saved for the hellish summer that lay ahead. *sigh* But alas, I know it won't last, so I will enjoy every second of it while it is here.Take time to stop and smell the world!

Springtime for Hitler

Springtime for Hitler

by Ville

Last night Butterflydeb and I went to see the musical "The Producers" at the Kansas City Music Hall. She had won the tickets from her fave radio station. How cool that she picked me to go with her! Opening night no less!

Well, we went last night. What a blast! For those of you unfamiliar with the material, "The Producers" is a Mel Brooks movie made in 1968, starring Gene Wilder and Zero Mostel. They portray Max Bialystock and Leo Bloom, 2 lonely desperate souls who meet by chance, then cook up a scheme to make millions by producing the WORST show ever to be done on Broadway. The script they find is offensive and ridiculous to say the least. They set off to hire the worst director and the most inexperienced actors. Whats the name of the musical?? "Springtime for Hitler" of course. A play written by a delusional ex-SS who insists that Hitler was a kind and misunderstood man, and that, of course, Germany WON!

This musical within the musical has to be the funniest 15 minute scene set to music that I have ever seen! Keeping in mind that this is Mel Brooks, the entire musical was predictable, offensive and irreverent. But his tongue and cheek method of writing always seems to bring it all into perspective. That is to say, in great Brooksian style, he has a way of shouting "Get over yourself, this is funny shit!"Of course he leaves no one out, he makes fun of Jews, Germans, Gays, Blacks, Irish and in this one even little old ladyies aren't spared. But done so well, and with such humor and satire, that I would find it hard to believe if anyone could be "truly" offended.

Of course, as predicted, their sure fire flop is an unmitigated success and they both end up in Sing Sing. I hope that if any of you get the chance to see this that they do so. Deb and I had such a great time, and I was amazed at how the 3 hour production flew by! That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

Another one of those days...

I've had another Cteeve day today. Not an all day thing. Beau and I did yard work this morning. He mowed, then I decided to rake up the spent grass, then together we bagged it up. After this we had our Sunday Hot Dogs (our tradition), then we headed off to Blockbuster to find a Video game. (It's what we do). As many of you know, the Blockbuster stores have video monitors all over their stores. Usually, to play the latest video release. But, today our local Blockbuster was playing the movie "Labyrinth". One of my top 5 fave movies, and also the movie that spawned the "our song" between Cteev and I. Not really a romantic kind of thing, but a symbol of our friendship. The lyrics are... Please forgive the size of the font as I cut and pasted.

As the world falls down
There's such a sad love
Deep in your eyes, a kind of pale jewel
Open and close
Within the sky I'll place the sky within your eyes
There's such a fooled heart
Beating so fast in search of new dreams
A love that will last within your heart
I'll place the moon within your heart

CHORUS:
As the pain sweeps through
Makes no sense for you
Every thrill is gone
Wasn't too much fun at all
But I'll be there for you
As the world falls down
Falling
(As the world) Falling down
Falling in love

I'll paint you mornings of gold
I'll spin you Valentine evenings
Though we're strangers till now
We're choosing the path between the stars
I'll leave my love between the stars

CHORUS
Falling
(As the world) Falling down
Falling
As the world falls down
Falling
Falling
Falling
Falling in love
As the world falls down
Falling
Falling
Falling in love
As the world falls down
Falling
Falling
Falling

Makes no sense at all
Makes no sense to fall

For us, it truly did "make no sense to fall". I miss him, I miss him everyday of my life.

Anyway.

When I saw what was playing at Blockbuster I couldn't figure out why they were playing such an old movie. I even asked Beau "I wonder why they are playing this??" It was later , when the whole soundtrack was in my head (you know how it is) that it hit me. Cteev was talking to me. I had forgotten about "our song". He found a way to remind me and to talk to me. I have this feeling that he will not be around much longer. I mean this is the spiritual sense, although he will be present for a few more months. I was almost asleep, and he decided to get me out of bed. Typical.

More to come

An Update

I know it has been a long time since my last post. Since I was fired, I have found myself a bit withdrawn. I think if it wasn't for the Wellbutrin I may have become agoraphobic. I found that I didn't want to go out in public, for fear that everyone that I saw would know that I was fired. Weird, I know, and I keep telling my rational self that "these people don't even know me!" and who cares if they do.

Anyway, my unemployment has finally kicked in, and I am getting $$ every week. I am getting but a smidgen less than I did while I was working at ACME. So, it's all good. For now. I know that I will have to go back the the grind someday, but I don't see anything wrong with enjoying the time off I have now. I really LOVE being a housewife. (Good god!! Did I say that??) But truly, I love taking care of my house and my husband. I get all the laundry done, I make his lunches and dinner is waiting for him when he gets home. ( Oh my gawd, I AM sick!!) :-) I never knew I was so traditional. It's quite amazing. I do admit that there are times when I am lonely and bored here alone all day, I am hoping I can find some kind of hobby to keep me occupied during the day. My dear friend Debbie suggested bowling the other day, and there is a bowling alley really close to our house. I LOVE bowling, but Beau is not fond of it, so maybe this would be a great opp for me to take it up again. Anyway, I wanted to keep you all updated on stuff, and to let you know that I am doing OK.

My good friend Steph has said that he wants to come up and stay a weekend next month, so I am looking forward to that. It will be WAY, to be able to just blow it out.