Friday Five

Given the time of year, this weeks Five is the Top Five Funniest Christmas Songs.

1. I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
2. Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas song
3. Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer
4. You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch
5. Bob and Doug's 12 Days of Christmas (and a Beer in a Tree)

Please add your own faves!

I notice.

My house is a-glow with Christmas. We have a sweet little "deer scene", on our front yard. We also have some awesome fun twinkly lights running along the top of our house. Why do I mention this? Because while Lashell, Morgan and I were baking our fingers away to make gifts for our respective offices, my darling Angel was crawling on the house hanging lights.

It's not that he hates Christmas, he just doesn't get into it as much as I do. But, there he was, climbing around on the roof, hanging lights and coordinating the "twinkles" just for me.

He did all this for me. What a beautiful and sweet gift he gave me. He not only crawled around on the roof to get the lights up, he also took his whole weekend off to do it.

I love him so much, and I am so grateful to him for what he did for me.
I love you so much Angel.
I notice.

Back to reality

I'm baaack! Lots of avocados. It rained. It was cold. We had a great time. I got drunk with my Mom. I miss them already. I want to move back. More later.

Just click your heels 3 times and say...

..."There's no place like home."

Beau and I are going to California next week to see my parental units. I talked to my dad this afternoon and he said that if I wanted to come home, he would buy the airfare. It is his Christmas gift to me. WOW!! I couldn't ask for a better gift. They usually send me money every year. (Hey, I don't mind that!) But this is so much more meaningful. We booked the flight and have the rental car all reserved. We will be leaving next Thursday the 7th and will return Monday the 11th. Short visit, but I can't swing any more days off than that. Well, I probably could but I didn't want to ask. Anyway, we're going home!!! I'm so excited I think my cheeks are going to explode.

The Friday Five

At the suggestion of The Incurable Insomniac, I have decided to make the Top Five things that: Make me be weird.

1. Finding a stem in a can of green beans.

2. Getting a 12 pack of pop, and finding that odd, unopened, yet mysteriously empty can.

3. Spam jelly.

4. Pooping in public restrooms.

5. People with lazy eye. I mean seriously! Which one should I look at?

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYBODY

Friday Fives

I've decided, since I am so bad about keeping up on my blog, I am going to start a weekly project. I am going to start the weekly Friday Five. Nothing too deep, just five things I have been thinking about, or maybe a top five, maybe the five reasons why I... Here is the first of my Friday Fives.

Five silly things that happened this week:

1) My husband attempting to explain to me the subtle nuances of the difference between the top crust and the bottom crust of a chicken pot pie.

2) My baby cat managed to get himself closed up in the bathroom all day yesterday (not really silly or funny, as I almost cried when he came out) But, he spent about 10 minutes in the box taking care of 9 hours worth of kitty business. ( good boy!)

3) A single sentence of a conversation I overheard: "I looked in my rear view, and there was a naked guy running across the street."

4) I got a rubber chicken key chain.

5) I inadvertently bought children's toilet paper. I didn't even know there was such a thing. It has pictures on it, designed to illustrate how much is appropriate to use.

I will take suggestions for Friday Fives. If there is anything you want to know and have always been afraid to ask. This is the time. :-)

Mmmmmm... turkey

Thanksgiving will soon be upon us. Next next Thursday as a matter of fact, and I would like to extend a heartfelt and warm welcome to anyone that can make it. I make a mean delicious bird and always have WAY (no really, I mean it WAY) more than Beau and I can consume. Aside from the ALMOST unmatched bird (I say almost, because if you have ever tasted Nettl(no E)'s, well, let's just say my mouth waters even now), there will be fabulous home made mashed spuds, green bean casserole, delicious dressing, pie, pie and more pie, corn, lovely, sort of, homemade bread (I have a bread maker) wonderful butternut squash and, well more as I add them.

I love this holiday, I love to cook and if you can make it, or want to... let me know.

Happy Birfday U!!

Happy Birthday Micah.

Chickenheads in Stillwater USA

There is a new "Chik-fil-A" opening here in Stillwater. Just what this town needs is another fast food place. It's due to open tomorrow morning. Apparently they have this grand opening deal, where the first 100 people to enter the restaurant on the first day of opening get Chik-fil-A for a year (bleh, can you imagine?). There is nothing too remarkable about that really. It's a gimmick. All business have a gimmick. The odd thing about this is that there are people who actually stalk out these grand openings and travel to camp out to be one of the first 100. I read it in the paper a few days ago, but I wasn't sure that I could believe it. Well, as I drove in to work this morning and passed the new eyesore, there they were. Tents of wayward Chik-fil-A fanatics actually camped out on the small strip of lawn in front of the store.

I couldn't believe what I was seeing. It was like a mini dead show. Dozens of chickenheads wandering around lost in their own beautiful dream of greasy chicken sandwiches and over-sweetened glasses of tea for a full year! The thought of eating that slop for a year is enough to make me want to hurl. Well, to each his own, I guess. I suppose some people will do anything for the chance at getting something for free.

Technology can bite my ass (but it is smaller now)

My stupid home computer has been infected or something. I can get onto the internet, but not much else. So... this should explain (I hope) my silence as of late. I have made several posts, only to find that they are not uploading to this site. Seriously frustrating. So I am writing this from work. Just wanted to post a quick FYI so you all know where I have been. **sigh**

On a lighter note (pun intended) I have lost more than 30 lbs since June. I am shrinking right out of my wardrobe. I would be happy with another 30 lbs lost, but ideally I would like to lose closer to another 40. Many of my clothes are too big for me now. Don't get me wrong, I am NOT complaining by any stretch, I just cannot afford a new wardrobe. I guess I better take up sewing. Know any good tailors?

I will dig up some good before pics and see about getting some now pics taken too.

FYI...

So, I have been feeling pretty crappy the last couple of days, so I broke down and took a trip to the walk in clinic this morning. Turns out I have a mild case of bronchial pneumonia, and another sinus infection.

Will the joy never end?

OK OK OK, all that crap aside. My Halloween bash will be on the 21st this year. That gives us all about 3 weeks to pick our costumes. I still have no idea what I am going to do. I do this every year. I say "This year I am going to plan ahead!" then I usually pull something outta my ass at the last minute. LOL. Any ideas for a clueless Ville?

Pay 50 bucks and pick up the garbage

So I dragged Jeanette out with me to see the show. We arrived at just the right amount of time. We got our tickets at the door, found our seats and about 5 minutes later the show started.

Arlo came out, along with his 2 kids, Saralee (guitar) and Abe (Keyboards), and his son in law Johnny (Also on guitar) and another dude on mando and steel guitar. They opened with an instrumental jig just to get the juices flowing, and then Arlo began to tell stories and back up with tunes. He was in perfect Arlo form.

They performed quite a few of Woody's songs, some originals by the kids, and of course a few of Arlo's classics and some new stuff. The highlight of the evening? After a brief intermission, Arlo came out and sat center stage to perform "Alice's Restaurant Masacree" in its glorious entirety. He has added and amended the story in a few key places to make it more understandable for a new generation, but it was still the same old Masacree that Arlo fans have known and loved for 40 years. I was just f&*#ing ecstatic. I was grinning from ear to ear and laughing and feeling so good!!

They ended with "This land is your land", a familiar Woody classic, and encored with a song that Woody had written on his death bed. Arlo had taken the lyrics and set his own tune to it. It was a sweet piece, about peace. Really lovely and moving.

After the show J and I went across the street to a little tavern called "Stonewall Jackson's" (we just call it The Wall), where we met up with Steph and Joel. We drank and laughed, bitched and moaned, waxed philosophic, laughed some more, drank some more and generally had a great time until we closed the place down.

I have not had so much pure unadulterated fun in such a long time. I felt free and easy and younger than I have in years. As Arlo put it, I felt "...that kind of peace that you have on the inside, that make dogs lick you and babies like you."

Thanks Arlo for a great show, and thanks to my friends for all the fun after.

I don't want a pickle....

"... I jus' wanna ride on my motorcycle..."

I'm going to see Arlo tonight!!!! Whoo hoo. I just happened to run across an article in the local paper. He and his family are performing tonight at the Seretean Theatre here in Stillwater.

This is going to be great. I had the good fortune to see him once before, years ago in Denver. He is one of my favorite talents of all time. I will undoubtedly have something more to post later.

I need a vacation

For those of you that do not know what it is I do for a living. I am a Staffing Consultant for Express Personnel Services. One of 500+ branches worldwide. My job description has many components. One of them being, I put people to work. I try to find jobs for people that come to us for assistance. Most of the time, I really love what I do. But lately it seems as though no one wants to work. I mean, they say they want a job, so I get them a job. How do some of these asshats repay me? I'll tell you. By calling me at noon to say they had a flat tire on the way to work this morning. "Your shift started at 8 a.m. right? Then why are you calling me at noon?"

This wouldn't be so bad, except this is not the first time something similar has happened. Last time she did this, she asked "What should I do?" I said "Go to work, I don't care if your shift is over in 3 hours, GO TO WORK" Well, she didn't go to work. So this time, I just simply told her to not return to her assignment.

Everyday I wake up wondering, "What asshat is going to fuck up today. Which one of these irresponsible jerkwads is going to try to ruin my day today.?" And then they have the nerve to turn around and somehow blame it on me? Workers as well as Employers. Ass Q. Hat didn't go to work today, and it is somehow MY fault. I can't make them go to work! I can't drag their lazy asses out of bed and tug them by the ear to get to work.

I've always been a cynic, but this place is really beginning to magnify it.

I need a good strong drink and a vacation. Preferably not in that order.

I seriously want to organize a weekend trip to Vegas in the next few months. Just 3 or 4 days of forgetting about reality.

It would be fun if we all went together! Lets do it!!!!

Ever feel like this?

That is all.

On taking food from strangers...

Some guys from a local church came into my office today, selling banana bread.

My response: "I don't take home made food from strangers."
One guy's response: "Oh, it's ok, we're Christians."
My response: "Well, THAT doesn't mean anything."
Their response... blank stares.
My response: shrug and walk away. I don't think they got it.

Reminded me of something that happened here at work last year.

It was the Friday after Thanksgiving and myself and a co-worker were volunteered to pull payday duty. These 2 yahoos come in with a bucket of suckers asking for donations for some Christian church.

My response: "I don't donate to churches."
One guy asks, "Why?"
My response: "I'm not a Christian."
One guys asks, "Then what ARE you?"
My response, not in a terribly pleasant tone: "I'm a PERSON."

Even my co-worker was dumbfounded by the ridiculous and insulting question. I think his buddy was embarrassed too. He looked at the guy and just said, "Let's go."

Here's what I have to say about that:
I don't need your religion, I don't need to be fucking saved, I don't donate to your crooked churches and I don't want your fucking banana bread!!

I think I do just fine as a good human being walking around on this crappy little ball of mud we call earth. I'm good to people, I love and care about my friends and family and I believe whole heartedly in the golden rule. I live far more Christ like than MOST Christians I have ever met. Yet somehow I am the one going to your dreamt up flaming hell?

So please, and I mean this in all sincerity and with a loving heart. To all you banana bread hawking, sucker toting money grubbing hypocrites KISS MY PAGAN ASS!!

Ahhhh... Better. Thank you.

Croc hunter has ceased to be...

Steve "The Crocodile Hunter" was killed today. Although I never really watched his program, I was always intrigued and fascinated by his seemingly fearless approach to animals. He educated and entertained a whole generation and I truly believe he will be missed.
The story of his death reads as follows:

"He came on top of the stingray and the stingray's barb went up and into his chest and put a hole into his heart," said Stainton, who was on board Irwin's boat at the time.

I am just glad, for his sake, that he went out as he lived, loving and appreciating life.

The problem with the past is that it rarely stays there

Do you ever think about people from your past? People you used to know? Whether they be old lovers, friends, hell even enemies. And do you ever wonder if they ever think of you? More over, do you hope they do? Or, can you not imagine that they have forgotten about you altogether?

I have been in the process of creating an online photo album. Something akin to Flickr, but it is called Webshots. While in the process of perusing the site, I ran across an old friend. Someone I was really close to once. I met him when I was 18. (Jesus, was that really 20 years ago?)

Anyway, one can say he was my "first love". Don't forget, I was 18. He was (well and still is) 6 years older, a musician and cute like a bug. He and I became pretty good friends. We went to the movies, to the beach, went to the local music stores during local events and took drives into the Ventura mountains. Chrast he drove like a maniac!

So anyway, I e-mailed him today. Nothing much, just a "wondering how you have been" kind of thing. His response...."Sorry, I'm really bad with names." Seriously??? No really...Seriously!? I mean, he said more than that, but he still didn't know it was me, not for sure anyway.

Wow. So I wonder to myself. Are there people out there that think of me and couldn't imagine that I would ever forget about them?

I hope they don't e-mail me any time soon.

Our little genius

Here is a picture of our newest addition. We have called him Einstein due to the wild hair that grows from his ears. I apologize for the quality of the photo. My husband took this with his phone.

I need a refill

It has occurred to me as of late, that I have really let myself go, spiritually. I used to find time to meditate. Light a candle and just let my mind wander and ponder. I used to take little "journeys" into my mind and refocus myself back to the things that are truly important. Love, compassion, generosity, friendship and a belief that I am not alone. I don't mean, alone physically, but that I am not the only being that feels the way about things that I do.

I used to have Steph do tarot readings for me and help me focus while journeying into a third sight. I miss that. I do my own "quickie" tarot readings now and then, but that almost feels like spiritual masturbation. Feels pretty good at the time, but not a lot of substance or connection to anyone, or anything else.

Now that we live in the same area again, I am going to have to take advantage of the expertise of the gift of tarot that Steph possesses. Apparently during Steph's recent trip to Florida, an old friend brought someone with him and Steph was asked to do a reading for her. From what I have been told, it was pretty special. So, now it's my turn! What say ye Oh great Burgundian One, when you are finished working your ass off, can we get together and do some readings?

Not how I thought my morning would go

I made a doctor's appointment this morning. I have had this bad ass little bastard cyst on my back for years. (Left side, near the shoulder.) Decades really. It has given me trouble twice before. It has been dormant for more than 10 years, until recently. Little bastard came back with a vengeance.

So, as I stated previously, I made a doctor's appointment. I got there a bit early, was taken in fairly quickly and Dr. English came in, in about 3 minutes. A record for any Dr. visit I have ever made. She looked at it and said "Oh my lord! What is it?" (You have to know Dr. English and her sense of humor.) She felt it, and looked at it for a second and said "We can't let this go any longer. I am going to go see if the procedure room is free." I said "Seriously? Now?" "Yep," she said "why wait?" and she was off.

Back in a minute or 2. "Lets go do this thing." *groan* "O-k"

In the procedure room, lying on my stomach, she starts in with the lidocaine shots. "SONNA OF A..!!!" Damn! I hate those freakin lido shots!!! She shoots the vile stuff all around and in the little bastard. *breathe breathe breathe*. My hands are sweating, my ears are ringing, I am in fact a tad nauseous at this point. She pokes at me a little bit. "Feel this?" ~"No"~ "How about this?" ~ "No" ~ "And thi..." ~"OW!!"~ "OK, more lidocaine"

There was so much pressure in the little bastard, that one of the shots actually backed up and shot lidocaine all over the room.

"Holy crap!" I said, and started busting up.

Finally I am numbed up. Dr. English starts cutting, and digging, and then... the tugging. This went on for a good 35 to 40 minutes. The little bastard had abscessed and was so big and divided, that she was unable to take it out in one piece. She put the biggest chunk in a little plastic jar, and the nurse showed it to me. Weird looking little bastard.

Finally Dr. English said, "OK, I'm done."

My whole body relaxed in one breath. I didn't realize how tense I had been until then. I had my arms crossed under my chin, and when I lifted my hands, they were drenched in sweat and wrinkled from being wet. My mascara had smudged all up over my eye and I was shaking like a leaf. I looked great!!! LOL. But it was done and I was ready to be done.

She gave me a script for an antibiotic and sent me on my way with some packing gauze and after care instructions. Because the little bastard was so big and abscessed, she could not suture me up. So, I have a big gaping wound on my back. Luckily my husband was a medic in the Army, so he can help me take care of it without getting all grossed out. I will be changing the outer dressing tonight, and will be changing the packing tomorrow morning. For now, I am feeling the numbness wearing off and am trying not to move that side of my body too much.

Meantime, the little chunk of the little bastard is in a jar, in my handbag. Smugly floating in there as though nothing happened. I can hear it laughing. Little bastard.

Caption This

Man: "You've already handed me my own balls, what more do you want?"
Wife: "Don't be silly dear. Those aren't YOUR balls..."

OK, so I stole this pic from RW over at Chasing Vincenzo. Too many jokes running through my head. Please, add your own caption.

Getting better is making me sick

So, I started taking an injectable medication last Tuesday for my diabetes. It's not insulin, but rather a very new drug designed to slow the metabolism and even out glucose levels. I knew the risk of side effects when I started taking it. But, damn, it sucks. Sunday night, right after eating, I became violently ill. Uncontrollable vomiting and (to put it politely) gastrointestinal distress. I have been sick like a dog ever since.

I missed work on Monday and went home early yesterday. Now I am sitting here at work, still fighting back the nausea. I talked to my Dr. and she assured me that these are the typical side effects and shouldn't last more than a week. A week??? Good lord and butter. How am I supposed to get this diabetes under control if

1. I can't keep my other medications down?
2. I cannot eat anything for fear of losing it 2 minutes later?
3. I get dehydrated, because water isn't even staying with me?
   

So, getting better, is making me sick. What a drag.

OK, I'm finished complaining.

On a happy note, we got a new kitten. He is gray and white and as sweet as can be. He still has not told us what his name is yet, but these things take time sometimes. Right now I just all him Little Buddy. So, Gilligan has crossed my mind more than once. LOL Took him to the Cat Clinic on Monday afternoon, and he got a clean bill of health and got his shots and stuff. I will post a pic as soon as I get one.

Million dollar Roundtable

The King Arthur of the Roundtable is up this week. He daydreams of having just enough money to allow him the freedom of lounging and avoiding the drudgery of the everyday commute. What about that? How much moolah would it take to set you for life? Head on over to Chasing Vincenzo and let him know your thoughts.

Feeling hot, hot, hot...

Some of my fellow bloggers have been commenting on the heat lately. And, as the A/C in my place of employment has been down all day, I thought I would say a few words myself.

I hate the heat. It sux. I hate sweating. It's 88 in our office right now, and only fixing to get hotter. I'm not happy and I want to cut off all of my hair and dunk my entire head in the sink. How did the pioneers do it??

OK, that's my rant for the week.

Shhhhh... It's dirty

Some years ago, my friends and I were talking about how odd it is that there are dozens of euphemisms for male masturbation, and none for the female. Of course thinking this unfair and discriminatory, we came up with our own list. If any one out there has anything to add please feel free. This is the La Boheme list of euphemisms for female masturbation. BTW I was inspired by Joe Wack, over at Hairshirt.

OK, euphemisms for female masturbation

• Combing the kitty
• Slapping the clam
• Petting the pussy
• Tickling the taco
  

I cannot think of any more right now, but I am sure some of you must have your own. I would love to see them. For now I am off to bed, for I must rise and go to work in the morning.

No bad kids, only poor parenting.

Is anyone else getting sick of the "cute kid" syndrome in television commercials lately?? Take for instance "Bob" the Quiznos baby. WTF?? He's creepy as hell, more annoying than Morton Downy on crack, and about as appealing as Spam on a saltine. Seriously, I would rather have the weird-ass singing hamsters back. "They got a pepper bar" Thank goodness they finally got rid of him. But, there are still so many annoying little kids in commercials.

Take for instance the one MANY sickeningly sweet cutesy kids from the Welches grape juice commercials:

Little pigtailed brunette girl: "Mom says she loves sharing her Welches white grape juice with the whole family, but I think she gets it just for herself.”

OK... so you think she gets it just for herself, yet your snot-nosed, selfish and inconsiderate little cakehole is still guzzling down the juice. Probably the ONE thing that mom indulges on for herself.

Another is the commercial for Universal Studios.
Another spoiled brat standing in front of a roller coaster: "If I had to kiss one more princess on my vacation, I was gonna hurl."

This kid is lucky to be on vacation to begin with. Her parents work their asses off all year just so she can have a little fun. But is she grateful? Does she say, “Gee thanks mom and dad!”? No, instead she complains.

When did poor behavior from children become acceptable? I get so frustrated as the media spins out more and more propaganda geared towards the acceptance of allowing kids to act like little jerk wads. Kids are not little adults. They should not be allowed to act like little adults, and parents need to get up off their asses and raise their kids. I know it is not the kids' fault. It's these parents who think they have to read a dozen self help books on parenting to raise their kids. Kids don't want to be left on their own to "find themselves". They need discipline and structure It does not take a village to raise a child, it takes good parenting. We are raising a nation of self centered, arrogant little jerks who have an exaggerated sense of entitlement. I feel sorry for them in a way. When they do reach adulthood, they are going to be slapped in the face with reality. How are they going to feel about their parents then?

Look what we got!

I bought this beast from my boss. He has let me make payments for it. It is going to be nice to have a vehicle that has hauling capabilities. It's a 1986 Chevy Blazer, with removable hard top. It may not be pretty, but it will get the job done.

Any ideas for names??

Happy Birthday Nettl(no E)

It is a couple days early, but tonight is her birthday party, so I wanted to say a few words about this incredible woman. I met Lynette about 6 years ago. She and Steph had recently moved to Stillwater and I and another friend drove down from Kansas City to meet her. I knew instantly that this was the woman that Steph had been seeking all his life. I also knew that this incredible, sweet and dynamic woman and I were destined to be great friends. Steph and I have always regarded one another as siblings, and when Steph and Lynette exchanged vows at their Holy Union ceremony I was honored and blessed to call her my sister in law. She even bestowed upon me the title of Matron of Honor.

She is not only beautiful, but also full of fire and passion. She is loyal and fierce as a mother, a wife and a friend. Her excitement and enthusiasm for life and love are nothing short of inspirational, and it is so easy to get swept away right along with her. She is generous to those who are in need, and grateful and appreciative when she is the recipient. So, here is to another year sis!

I love you Nettl(no E) Happy Birthday!!!!!!

On what could have been

A short while ago some friends and I were discussing the untimely deaths of some of our great musicians. Imagining what they would be doing now. What wonderful musical gifts we would have now, if only they hadn't died so young.

Think about it. What would John Lennon be composing now? What musical direction would Freddie Mercury have gone? Croce, Marley, Stevie Ray...

I finally broke down today and bought myself Queen's Greatest hits CD (I have it on vinyl and am still holding out hope that one day I will again have a turntable). Anyway, as I was listening, my mind once again wondered about Freddie and his incredible talent and diversity. There have been so many lost to us, taking with them talents that could never be reproduced. Who would you like to see come back for one last set?

The Naked Truth

Who among us isn't aware that this country is in a sad state of affairs? Head on over to Hairshirt and find out how he feels about it. Then let him know how YOU feel.

Silly Putty Rocks

I got Silly Putty for my birthday and I have to say, Silly Putty rocks!!

"Ahhh, you're my best friend."

Among several other thoughts than ran through my mind while I was under the influence of nitrous oxide, the one that stands out the most is my minds ramblings about the "degrees" of friendship.

Somehow in our up bringing, we are taught that, no matter how many friends you may have, there is always "The BEST friend". Do you ever feel guilty because you don't know how to "categorize" your friendship with someone? It's ridiculous. I have so many friends. Are we expected to prioritize our affection? Are we really expected to love people based on some imaginary scale?

The other afternoon my friend Jaeson stopped by my office. We had a great conversation about friendship. It was like an epiphany for me. I said to him, "I don't make friends, I fall in love." I had never said those words before. I had never really analyzed the subject. Yet I found the words falling from my lips as though I had known this all my life. But it's the truth. All the great relationships in my life have been love at first sight. Meaning, there isn't really a "warming up period". You are in or you are not. Maybe that sounds crappy, but I also have a philosophy that, I am not willing to waste my time if it isn't forever. I don't have time for strays. That being said...

...What is the basis for a great friendship? Commonalities? Contradictions? And what makes any one friend more "important" than another? Does time and space diminish the friendship? Do we place value on our friends based on what they can give us?

I am blessed with so many people in my life that love me. How do I choose "the best"? It seems so silly, so sophomoric, and yet it is something we carry through out all our lives. I have more than one best friend. All for different reasons.

Who is your best friend? And why?

Laughing gas, friendship and refried beans

I went to the oral surgeon today to have 2 more teeth extracted. I opted to be completely knocked out this time. I have had this procedure done too many times, but never more than one at a time. I really didn't want to be coherent for 2. Anyway, I picked up Steph at around 8:30 and headed to the dentist office. We got there just a few minutes early, and I got taken in fairly quickly.

After getting settled in the chair, one of the nurses hooked me up with some oxygen. It smelled sweet and helped to clear the headache that I woke up with. After about 5 minutes she informed me that she was turning on the laughing gas. "Let me know if it is too much" she said. (Yeah right.) LOL. Just as I was saying to myself nothing's happening, it kicked in. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Ahhhhh, yeah, this is nice. Damn, I forgot how much I love the stuff!!! I was really enjoying the ride, but was truly and honestly thinking, "Damn, I wish Berg could be in here sharing this with me." For those of you who know us and have been around us when we are 'on fire', you could only imagine what THAT would be like. LOL.

A few minutes go by and the Doc comes in:

"How you doing?"
"Oh, I'm just peachy."
"Well, good. We are going to give you a few minutes to let the gas kick in."
"Oh it's kicking doc."
Chuckles and grins. "OK, well I will be back in just a bit to get your I.V. in ok?"
Slowly and contentedly: "Okelee dokelee."

He came back, just a bit too soon for me (hehehe) and proceeds to go over step by step exactly what he is doing: "OK, now I am going to wrap this band around your arm to help your veins show themselves," Mmmhmm. "now you squeeze your hand into a fist and I am going to lightly slap the inside of your elbow to help coax them out." K "Now, I am just wiping the area with some alcohol, so it's going to feel wet and cold." (this time, to myself . LOL OK doc, seriously I get it. "Now, your going to feel a little pinch as I get the needle in" No problem. I didn't even know, didn't feel it. "OK, now we are going to give you something to make you feel even happier." (again to myself) Yeah!? Cool!!

I was still waiting for this to happen, when I was woken by the nurse who informed me they were all done. Wow. It's such an odd sensation. I wonder if that is what it is like to be hypnotized. Funny thing though. I had continued thought process through the whole thing. Last time I was put under, I had a definite "blackout". Not this time, this time my brain was still babbling on. At first I didn't really remember want I had been thinking about, but as the day has progressed, I am beginning to remember. But thats another blog.

OK, so now the nurse helps me to my feet and we go into the recovery closet and she asks me who brought me. I was trying to say Steph, but apparently I wasn't getting it out right (mouth full of gauze and numb all over), so I finally said "Berg, just ask for Berg". So Steph comes back to see me and he and the nurse help me to sit up right. Steph asks me how I'm doing and all I can say is "I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse" I guess you had to be there, but with all the gauze stuffed in my mouth, it was just all I could think of. More jokes were made, and Steph ribs me for making the nurse call him Berg. LOL.

The nurse then gives Steph the after-care papers and tells him what they say (cuz I am not going to remember). Then he drove me back to my house. I thought I was pretty lucid at the time, but I only remember about 3/4 of the drive. Anyway, we got back here and I swallowed some pain meds and the antibiotics they prescribed (I have a heart murmur, so the antibiotics are a precaution). The Berg and I had some pretty good conversation about life and friendship, and how wonderful it is that we are the friends we are. And how great it is to see our circle grow. It was a very sweet and slightly misty conversation between 2 people that love one another.

Steph then generously got me some refried beans and rice from Taco Bueno, and he had some tacos. Lynette came by to get Steph around 1:15 or so and I took another pain med and crashed on the couch.

So it sucks to lose more teeth, but, all in all, knowing I have such great friends who will always take care of me when I really need it makes it not so bad. Besides, I got good drugs out of the deal! LOL. I'm so predictable.

Oh I failed to mention, I went in my polka dotted Wonder Bread (tm) pajamas.

Snozwanglingflapdoodledingdangwangdoozie

Wow. Saturday night was a total blast!

After a good old American feast of hot dogs and hamburgers, we all went out on the patio to indulge in our right to party. (Beastie Boys said so) Boy, did we ever excercise our rights. We made up stupid shit, sang some songs, and had a whole lot of laughs. I don't remember going to bed, but I do remember waking up at 11 a.m. and feeling like someone kicked me in the gut and smashed me in the head. Not to mention the dizziness and nausea. I went back to bed and crawled up around 3 pm feeling much better. Man, I haven't put a hurtin' on myself like that in a very very long time. And I don't plan on doing it again anytime soon.

But MAN we had fun!!!!

To blog or not to blog

Has this ever happened to you?

We never even cut the watermelon

Had a BBQ on Sunday. We had such a great time! At least I think we did. I know I did. I hope everyone did. We cued 3 big ol slabs of meat and had beans, bread, deviled eggs and the obligatory veggie trays. Surprisingly, most of the veggies got eaten which is kind of unusual.
All the usual suspects attended, Steph and Lynette and their three teens, Lauren, Heather and Nathan. Megan came down from Kansas. Lashell made it just as we sat down to eat and it made the evening perfectly well rounded.

After dinner we all sat out on the patio with our respective drinks and "did the weirds". We played hangman, drew silly (not to mention disgusting) pictures and made up silly songs. We laughed and carried on. Just like the good old days. I had gone out and found a seeded water melon so that we could have a seed spitting contest, but we got too busy being stupid, that we never even cut the water melon. Oh well!! Thanks everybody for making this weekend so fun and memorable!!

Swords or shields

There is someone in my past that has sprung to thought quite a lot lately. He and I were so close once. There was a time when we did everything together. We loved one another passionately, yet for some reason felt the constant need to tear one another down.

For the most part we were pretty good at building back up again, but after years of mutual abuse, it had become tiresome and (not without prompting) I finally walked away, figuratively tearing my shirt and having done with him. That was 8 years ago.

Though he and I have seen one another once since then, and even made an attempt to undo the damage, at the time it all seemed too little too late. But now I find myself wanting to reconnect. Not to bring things back to the way they were. That is neither possible nor desirable. But rather to open up a dialog with him once again. Start fresh.

We are both now pushing 40. We were both teenagers when we met. Two wounded souls grasping to make sense of this crappy, wonderful, hellishly sweet little world we live in. We both made a lot of mistakes, but, how does one forget years of love, laughter and devotion? Am I mistaken? Am I a fool? Will it be too much to hope for? As an adult, looking back, I realize now that it wasn't swords with which we chose to battle, but shields.

If you are reading this PTB, I would like to finally put down the defenses and get to know YOU.

The latest on the visit

Beau talked to his mom last night, and it turns out that she will be coming here with Em (that's my step-daughter). They will be coming on or around the 5th of July and leaving on the 10th. Only 5 days. *sigh* I'm so weird. As nervous and apprehensive as I had become about this, I am so disappointed that the visit will be so short. Also, as much as I love Beau's mom, I was kinda hoping for a little exclusivity. But Beau and I talked last night and he made a good point. For all intents and purposes, Em really doesn't know either one of us. She is close to her grandmother, and this way she will be comfortable having someone she knows with her. This will be the door opening for future visits.

I am so thrilled that Beau and Em have this chance to reconnect. It has been a long time coming and I just have all the optimism in the world that this is the new and fresh start they have both been needing for so long.

Big changes ahead

Beau got a message from his mother last night that she has talked to his ex, and that arrangements have been made for his daughter to come stay with us. When, and for how long, we don't know yet. She turned 15 today and I don't know what to expect. I don't know her at all.

Needless to say, I am a bit apprehensive. Don't get me wrong, I am really looking forward to meeting her and getting to know her. I just don't have room in my life for teenage drama and conflict. With the diabetes, the ongoing toe healing, and now I found out I have advanced periodontal disease and will need to have 2 more of my teeth extracted. I am already doing 95% of all the housework, I do most of the cooking, and work full time. I'm tired a lot and don't feel so great much of the time. There will be some adjustment and changes in our life. Whether she stays for 2 weeks, or 2 months, or even 2 years. I have always been a dynamic person by nature, but at the same time I have become pretty content with the routine in my life.

Happy Heimer Day!!!

Happy, lucky, joy day to Geo3rge, Julie and the late, great Stevenheimer!!

To all the muthas out there

Happy Mammiotosis Day to all you Mothers out there. I hope it is a peaceful and joyful day full of love and appreciation.

Stand up and say hi!

I have noticed a considerable jump in the number of visitors here in the last few weeks. I would love to know who is stopping by. Leave a comment and say howdy!! Let me know who you are and how you got here. I am really curious to know who has graced my space.

More propaganda for poor behavior

There is another commercial out now that's just irritating as all hell.

Little girl standing in front of a roller coaster: "If I have to hug one more princess on my vacation, I'm gonna hurl."

Hmmm. How do you think the poor woman in the stupid princess costume feels?? "If I have to hug one more smug, snot nosed, spoiled, self centered brat I am going to puke!"

Seriously, that kid is lucky she even has the luxury of being on such a vacation. Her parents work and slave at their lousy jobs all year just so the little jerk can have a week of entertainment. I bet she never even said thank you. She probably thinks she somehow "deserves" it.

And when did this trend start? This trend of advertisers propagating poor behavior as normal and acceptable. It's appalling. No wonder kids today have such a twisted sense of entitlement. It has begun to spill into our society as this generation of lazy little f&*^&kers have begun to join the work force. No experience, lousy job history or no job history at all. But they want a cushy office job that pays $10.00 an hour. Uuuuumm. NO!

What are these parents teaching these kids?? What ever happened to "If you work hard and prove yourself, you can get all the things you want in life." Now it seems as though the mentality is "I want this and I don't want to have to work for it. Just give it to me." Well Bite Me! You get nothing. It seems so simple. Give nothing...get nothing. Jeez. Do the math.

Well, speaking of working, I guess I better do some.

Basics, bunco, beauty and bananas

Sometimes when one is so busy with work and shit, one forgets about the basics. Sometimes this job I have just stresses me out like nothing else. Monday was one of those days. I won't go into detail, just suffice it to say it was a sucky-ass day. But, that evening I went to Jeanette's daughters first dance recital. She is four.

At one point during her routine, she saw me in the audience and got this incredible sweet and happy smile on her face. I felt a little rush of joy wash over me as I thought about how important I have become to this child's life. Suddenly the crapiola at work didn't seem so damned important anymore.

But let me backtrack a little. The weekend leading up to the sucky-ass Monday was really a lot of fun. Friday, Jeanette and I went to play Bunco. She got me hooked on this monthly female gabfest a few months ago and I have been going with her ever since. I have never won anything, but it is allot of fun nevertheless.

The next morning we got up early and, along with her mom, drove to Tulsa for a Glamour Shots session. This took around 5 hours of the day, but we had such a great time! Getting all dolled up and playing celeb for a day. It did make me think about how difficult it must be to have to do this day in and day out. No wonder so many models suffer from exhaustion and dehydration. But the photos we all picked out are fabulous and I can't wait to get them. They should be coming in the mail in the next week or so. I will scan and post when I can. I'm feeling better and better these days, and it was neat to sort of portray that feeling on film.

I have had to change my diet a bit. Nothing as drastic as I had originally thought. Really more about portions than anything else. And I am eating allot of bananas. Well, at least one a day anyway. I usually eat one for breaky. Good thing I like them. But I swear one morning I am going to wake up with a pointy head and slick yellow skin!

Well, I suppose I need to get to work. I have been here for an hour and have accomplished nothing but this blog entry. Sometimes the boss frowns on behavior such as this. :-)

What am I doing here?

I was watching the Food Network last night. Alton Brown hosting a show called "Kitchens of the Future". It was a pretty cool show. Lots of cool fun gadgets that may or may not actually hit the market. Some of them were just lame. Like a spoon that tells you when something is sweet or sour etc... How stupid is that? I mean seriously folks, just taste it. Anyway, after that was over I left it on FN.

Rachael Ray was going to Santa Barbara, California. She visited places I had been to. Santa Barbara Seafood Company on the SB pier and Cold Springs Tavern, a biker bar and grill nestled in the hills. I was becoming very homesick. My hometown of Oxnard is a mere 40 minute drive south, and a Saturday afternoon drive into SB was something I enjoyed on several occasions.

After that show, the next episode had Rachael venturing into Los Angeles and surrounding areas. They went by Neptune's Net in Malibu. (Best clam chowder on the west coast.) Then she went to The Inn of the Seventh Ray, a vegetarian restaurant that my ex and I frequented in Topanga.

Don't get me wrong, I love my life here. My best friend is here, I have made wonderful new relationships here, I have a great house that I love (most of the time), I have a great job and of course, the best part, I live here with the love of my life, my husband Beau (who is, I might add, an Oxnard kid too). But, I do find myself daydreaming of being home again. I miss the beaches, the mountains, the diversity of its residents, skate punks and aging hippies alike. I miss bonfires at the beach, strolling through the many, many shops on Hollywood Blvd. and Melrose. I miss the farmers markets. Hell, I even miss the old Mexican ladies who hawk homemade tamales on Sunday afternoons. I realize now how much I took it all for granted. As a kid, it never occured to me that there was any other way of life.

I do really love living here in OK, but I can't imagine growing up here. Furthermore, I can't imagine growing old here. I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I do know, I need a beach or a mountain range to marvel at. The sweeping windy plains of OK are alright for now, but I can't see myself staying here forever. Will I go back to California? Unless we have LOTS of money, it is quite doubtful, but, I do know I don't want to die in OK.

More medical crapiola

I have yet another follow up on my toes today. They are healing but very VERY slowly. I was thinking about them last night. I am so used to caring for them and being conscious of them, that I don't know if I will ever be normal again. I mean, am I going to roll up my pants leg to get me feet in for the rest of my life? When walking about barefoot, will I always attempt to point my big toes skyward? Will I always be acutely aware of how close someone is standing in proximity to my feet? I don't know, but it sure is getting old.

On another note, I am meeting with a Diabetic Educator this afternoon. I am looking forward to this as I have no idea what I am doing. As far as my diet is concerned, all I know to do is to cut out the obvious. Sugar, pasta, white bread etc... But other than that I am floundering. It's a good thing I like salad. Right now I am enjoying a breakfast bowl from Carl's Jr. that Lashell was good enough to get for me. It's like a breakfast sandwich without the bread. Don't get me wrong, it's good, but, it's no sammich. *sigh*.

But, I digress, it could be much worse. While diabetes is a life-long disease, it is also a controllable one and I will live a long, happy life with a few modifications and some meds. I seriously need to get off my big, fat, white ass and do some exercise. I really want to start walking, but I cannot get into my walking shoes with my damned toes like this. I know it sounds like an excuse, but my feet get really sore and tired if I try to walk in these sandals I have been wearing. Bleh... I need to stop complaining!!

A musical meme

Answer the following questions using only the song titles from a chosen musician or band.

1. Musician I chose:
   Queen
   
   
2. Are you male or female?
   Foxy Lady (I know it was a Hendrix tune, but they did a remake and I am counting it)
   
   
3. Describe yourself:
   Fat Bottom Girls
   
   
4. How do some people feel about you?
   Friends Will be Friends
   
   
5. How do you feel about yourself?
   I'm Going Slightly Mad
   
   
6. Describe your ex:
   See What a Fool I've Been
   
   
7. Describe your current significant other:
   You're My Best Friend
   
   
8. Describe a best friend:
   Bohemian Rhapsody
   
   
9. Describe some one who is no longer your friend:
   Where Are You Now
   
   
10. Describe where you want to be:
    Freedom Train
    
    
11. Describe how you live:
    Lazing On a Sunday Afternoon
    
    
12. Describe how you love:
    Love Me Like There's No Tomorrow
    
    
13. What would you ask for if you had just one wish?
    The Millionaire Waltz
    
    
14. Share a few words of wisdom:
    Stop All the Fighting
    
    
15. Now say goodbye:
    Don't Look Back

Tagged by Steph

I have been tagged by The incurable Insomniac.

1. What were you doing 10 Years Ago?
   I was living in Colorado with my now ex-husband and being generally miserable.
   
   
2. 5 Years Ago?
   Living in Kansas with my now husband Beau and working for ACME Brick as an office manager.
   
   
3. 1 Year Ago?
   I was in the very very beginning stages of negotiations of the sale of my home.
   
   
4. Five snacks you enjoy:
   Now that I know I am diabetic, the list has changed, so it now is as follows:
   Pig Bubbles (aka fried pork rinds)
   Sugar Free wafer cookies (peanut butter is way yum!)
   Cottage Cheese
   Vienna Sausages
   Tuna salad with soy crisps
   
   
5. Five songs you know by heart but wish you didn't:
   YMCA - Village People
   Because of You - Kelly Clarkson
   Theme from the Brady Bunch
   My HS alma mater
   The Boston market "Eat Steak" song
   
   
6. Five things I would do with a LOT of money:
   Pay off all debt (house, bills etc..)
   Take care of all my friends and family
   Buy a new reliable vehicle, or 2
   Seeing as I now have quit my job, I would travel the world
   Settle somewhere in Europe
   
   
7. Five things you would never wear:
   An OSU t-shirt
   Diamonds
   A cowboy hat
   Fake hair
   Any religious symbol
   
   
8. Five things you should never have worn:
   Leg warmers
   Stretch pants
   Leather overall shorts with fishnet stockings
   A gold wedding band
   Catholic school uniform
   
   
9. Five things you enjoy doing:
   Hanging with my peeps
   Playing video games
   Entertaining
   Napping on Sunday afternoon
   Cooking
   
   
10. Five bad habits:
    Smoking
    Interjecting unsolicited opinions
    Leaving my shoes where ever I have taken them off
    Not replacing the TP
    Not replacing trash liners
    
    
11. Five people who must fill this out:
    I think Steph tagged 'em all!

I knew I was sweet, but this is ridiculous

Last weekend was an adventure. Saturday morning our sewer was backed up AGAIN, so we decided to try our new drain bladder. It is a device that you hook up to your garden hose and shove down into the main sewer line. It fills up with water, and then lets the water go in a huge burst. This is to get the clog unstuck. It will do this over and over until the clog has been completely swooshed away with the force of the water.

So anyway, Beau hooked the damn thing up and shoved it in the line and just let it go. He went off to work and I monitored the progress. I pulled the thing back out and was puzzled because it didn't seem to be working, so I tried just filling it up outside of the main. Hmmm...it's not filling. Must be a defective bladder. (I know how funny that sounds.) So, I pack the thing up and through some miracle I find the receipt, and decide to take it back to Lowes.

OK. New bladder in hand, I hook it up and stick it down the hole. (Why I didn't test it first is beyond me.) About an hour and a half to 2 hours go by. It is a beautiful day, I decide to open all the windows in the house. I go into the office to open that window, and discover that the carpet is soaking wet, from the back wall and in a good 5 feet or so. HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!! I run outside, pull the thingy from the main again, and discover the problem. The bladder would have worked just fine if the hose had been spewing water out of it, instead of backing up into my house!!!!!!!!

WOW. One problem escalated into 2 problems. Crapiola! Well, I called the Home Warranty company and of course, no one is available until Monday. In the meantime, I think to myself, hopefully we can at least hook the bladder up to one of the other 2 faucets outside. But the hose is too short. I need to get groceries anyway, so off to the Evil Wal*Mart faction I go. Hooked up the thingy to a different faucet and shoved it back in the hole. At least this time it was working properly. Still didn't resolve the plumbing issue, but it was filling up. Beau finally came home in the afternoon, and being as we had no sewer system, we decided that it was necessary to vacate.

We ended up in Tulsa at an extended stay hotel. You know the kind that have little kitchens in them so you aren't spending a bunch of money on eating out. We came back to Stillwater on Monday and had a plumber out to fix the sewer problem (FOR NOW). Apparently, we have broken pipes. We have time before we have to get them fixed, but it will cost around $2000.00.

*sigh*

I had a pre-existing Dr's appointment on Monday as well. A follow up appointment for my toes. The Dr. looked at them and could see that they are not healing right. He asked me if I was a diabetic, I replied, "Not that I know of." So he decided to do a blood sugar test. Low and behold, I popped 297. Normal levels are somewhere between 70 and 90. So he says to me, "There's your problem, dear. You're an undiagnosed diabetic!"

I knew it, I just knew it, but I needed the kick in the ass he gave me to face it and finally do something about it. An appointment was made for me to see Dr. English, a family practionioner here in Stillwater, the following Thursday. She confirmed what I already knew. So, now I am on diabetic meds and testing my blood sugar twice a day.

So it's official. I am a diabetic. But the sewer is running fine.

Habits and addictions

It's funny how one gets used to things being a certain way. We don't tend to realize how much we take those things for granted until they are gone, or even delayed.

My dearest friend and favorite blogger, The Incurable Insomniac, has been rather under the weather and has been unable to blog. It has only been 2 days, but it feels as though it has been weeks!! Reading his blog is part of my morning routine. When I get to work, it is usually one of the very first things that I do.

I have known Steph for almost 20 years and have a fairly good grasp on how he thinks and emotes. In fact, we are more like siblings than merely friends, but I have found that I am still learning more about him and continually getting to know him through his blog.

Get to feeling better soon Stephooch! I need a fix! (Jeez, sounds like it's all about ME dosn't it?) ;) No seriously, I hope you get to feeling well again.

If you believe...they put a man in the beans

This is kinda cool. See if you can find the man in the pile of coffee beans.Yes, he is in there.

Scientists say if you can find the man in 3 seconds or less then your right brain is developed better than most people. 3 seconds to one minute, then your right brain has developed normally. More than 3 minutes, then your brain is functioning slowly and you need more protein.
I found him in less than a minute. Once you find him, you will wonder why it took so long. LOL.

My Word Cloud

My Word Cloud

A place for your butt

Beau and I finally were able to buy a brand new sofa!!! It's not a hand-me-down or a crappy Wal*Mart futon. It is a real sofa!!! It is a 3-piece sectional. One end is a recliner and on the other end is a pull out sleeper. I am so excited!!! It's a doeskin color, so I will be able to pull color into the room with throws and pillows. Good ol' tax returns. Here it is in green. I couldn't find a pic of the right color.

It's so nice to have a comfortable place to rest my butt.

Tag, I'm It

OK, I have been tagged by The Incurable Insomniac. I will tag at the end of the meme.

1. Black and White or Color; how do you prefer your movies?
   If it was filmed in B&W, then I want to see it in B&W. Likewise with color. I do not condone colorization.
   
   
2. What is the one single subject that bores you to near-death?
   SPORTS!!! It's a game. Get over it. 'Nuff said.
   
   
3. MP3s, CDs, Tapes or Records: what is your favorite medium for prerecorded music?
   I enjoy the portability and convenience of CDs and MP3s, but gimmee good ol' vinyl any day!
   
   
4. You are handed one first class trip plane ticket to anywhere in the world and ten million dollars cash. All of this is yours provided that you leave and not tell anyone where you are going ... Ever. This includes family, friends, everyone. Would you take the money and ticket and run?
   Wow, good one. Well, with no other way around the other stuff. I would say NO. If I really thought I could get away with it, I would take the money and figure out a way to get my friends and family with me. If this was impossible, then I would rather have my loved ones.
   
   
5. Seriously, what do you consider the world's most pressing issue now?
   Education. I agree with Lynn and Steph.
   
   
6. How would you rectify the world's most pressing issue?
   I'm not sure. Better pay for teachers would be a good start though.
   
   
7. You are given the chance to go back and change one thing in your life; what would that be?
   I would have visited with Cteev when I had the chance in California.
   
   
8. You are given the chance to go back and change one event in world history, what would that be?
   Lennon would have ducked.
   
   
9. A night at the opera, or a night at the Grand Ole' Opry—Which do you choose?
   Easy. Opera.
   
   
10. What is the one great unsolved crime of all time you'd like to solve?
    Who took my good scissors??
    
    
11. One famous author can come to dinner with you. Who would that be, and what would you serve for the meal?
    JD Salinger, and I would serve porterhouse with a baked potato and a great dinner salad.
    
    
12. You discover that John Lennon was right, that there is no hell below us, and above us there is only sky—what's the first immoral thing you might do to celebrate this fact?
    Already believing that there is no hell, and no heaven, I guess I wouldn't do anything differently.

I am tagging Lashell

Tard Carts and Hamburgers

After my toenailectomy, I was instructed to stay off of my feet for a few days so that they can begin to heal properly. Not an easy thing to do for someone who likes to be doing "stuff", but, I am doing my best with the help of Beau and Lashell.

Lashell came over Friday night to stay with us because her house was being treated for fleas. I needed to go shopping on Saturday, so I asked her to go with me so she could follow me around as I was going to be in one of those little electric carts (I call em tard carts--no letters please, get a sense of humor). We got to the Evil Walmart Faction and Lashell dropped me off at the front door and I went in and climbed onto the silly wagon. I waited by the flower section for Lashell to come back in. It took me a few minutes to get used to the damn thing. At one point, I went a bit too fast and slammed into a shelf getting stuck. Lashell had to lift the shelf and get me unstuck. I was fine, but the shelf now has quite a good bend in the middle. LOLOL.

We had most of our shopping done and were in the frozen food aisle when it happened. The damed cart ran out of battery. So I waited there by the frozen pizzas as Lashell went back to get me a fresh cart. It seemed I was sitting there forever, people staring "What is she doing?" Eventually I heard the familiar whining coming around the corner behind me. I turned my head to look and there is Lashell sporting a cart of her own. I lost it then!!!! Oh man, we must have looked like doofaces.

She brought me the new cart, and a Walmart zombie came and took the dead one back to the front. We finished up there, headed back to my house dropped off the groceries and then we went to Lashell's house so she could start putting her house back in order after the bug bombing. Noticing that it was cold as all get out, she checks the thermostat. Great, heat's not working, so we decide she will be staying Saturday night too. Alright with me! I love the company. So we had homemade hamburgers and fries for dinner, then we played poker till the wee hours. All in all it was a really fun weekend.

With or without toe nails.

OK, Seriously...

Yesterday was an interesting day for me. I had made an appointment to see a podiatrist for my weird ass toenails. I have been suffering from ingrown toenails on my big toes for several years. The left one had gotten so bad that I decided it was time to have some medical intervention. The appointment wasn't until 1:45, so I went to work as usual. Nothing remarkable about the work day really. I was nervous about the appointment, as I was fairly certain the doctor would opt to remove the offending nail, and possibly both of them.

Sometime around 10:00 a.m. or so, a lady walks into my office with a vase of flowers and a purple teddy bear. In my head I'm thinking "Huh? It's not Valentines day, and besides, Beau wouldn't do something like that." (Although I wish he would, if you are reading this honey, hint hint... ;) )

Anyway, she hands me the gifts and I read the card. "Good luck. You will be fine. We love you. Signed Your Duck family"

Awww, how sweet. They are from my co-workers. The duck thing is an inside joke. Long story, I may tell you later. Anyway, it was such a sweet gesture and I am touched.

Lashell, Megan and I order a big order of fried rice and eggrolls from a local Chinese restaurant (man, that was good), and soon after it is time to leave for the appointment. Lashell follows me home to drop off my car, and we go to the Doc.

After filling out all the friggin paper work, I am led into the exam room. Doc comes in and chats with me a bit, poking at my toes with a metal, pointy sharp weird.

"Does this hurt?"
"Uhhh, YEAH!"
"Is this tender?"
"Meh, not so much."
"I would stick this under your nail, but you probably wouldn't like me if I did."
My response: "Doc, I'm not sure I like you yet anyway."

The nurses roar with laughter. I was proud. Hehehe. The exam is complete. Not ingrown toenails after all, but some nasty syndrome called Subungual Exostosis. Apparently this happens to people in their 60s most commonly. Leave it to me to be before my time. I've always been a trend setter. *sigh*

Treatment? Yes, both toenails must be removed. I won't go into the procedure too much, as I kinda wanna puke when I think about it, but I will tell you that getting several shots of Lidocaine in your toes, is THE MOST PAINFUL THING I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED!!

After the first shot, the nurses looked at my face and one of them asked. "Do you want your bear?" Choking back tears and in a feeble whiny voice I hear myself say "Yeah, I think I do." The nurse hands me the bear, and I proceed to choke the hell outta this poor little thing. Silly as it may seem, I was so glad to have that bear. I closed my eyes and squeezed my little buddy and tried not to start bawling like a baby.

OK, OK, OK. Breathe, breathe breathe. Shots are done. Right toe is not going as numb as I would like, so one more shot. It's ok though, because it's mostly numb already and I hardly feel the needle.

After the nails are removed, the doc makes a small incision at the tip of my toes, to get to the spur underneath. This is where I almost puked. No pain or anything, but the sound of him scraping at the bone to get it reduced in size was almost enough to send me over the top. Once again the purple bear gets what's coming to him. Anyway. I'm bandaged up and sent on my merry way.

After this extremely stressful past hour, I'm dying for a cigarette, so I called work to let them know I was done and Megan could come get me, then I slipped outside to light up a smoke. Nothing remarkable about that. I watch as Megan turns into the parking lot where I am waiting. As she sees me I see her head go back in a fit of laughter. I catch a glimpse of myself in the windows of the clinic. Long black velvet peasant skirt, bright red shirt, tan medical sox, blue surgical booties and holding a purple teddy bear. I busted up laughing too. I seriously looked like a retard. And then I start walking, well shuffling, towards the car. Megan busts up again. I must have been a site. It still makes me laugh.

Megan took me to the drug store to fill my scripts and then she took me home, settled me on the couch and left me to my TV and healing process.

So I am stuck at home today, too. Suckiest part, I can't even do housework or anything. Just stuck with the tube, the computer, and maybe read a good book. Not too bad really, but I am not a sedentary person. I like doing "stuff".

Anyway, that was my interesting day. I'm hobbling back to the couch now. Hendrix, the purple teddy sits beside me.

Is it just me??

Is anyone else getting sick of the "cute kid" syndrome in television commercials lately?? Take for instance "Bob" the Quiznos baby. WTF?? He's creepy as hell, more annoying than Morton Downy on crack, and about as appealing as Spam on a saltine. Seriously, I would rather have the weird-ass singing hamsters back. "They got a pepper bar"

The other one that has been pissing me off lately, is one of the MANY sickeningly sweet cutesie kids from the Welches grape juice commercials.

Little pigtailed brunette girl: "Mom says she loves sharing her Welches white grape juice with the whole family, but I think she gets it just for herself"

OK... so you think she gets it just for herself, yet your snot-nosed, selfish and inconsiderate little cakehole is still guzzling down the juice. Probably the ONE thing that mom indulges on for herself.

I know it's not something I should get all riled up about. And to be fair I'm not REALLY. But damn. I don't need a bunch of ankle biting kids to tell me what I should and should not consume. Especially when they aren't even old enough to know the value of a dollar. (Especially MY dollar.)

Fit for the future

I have always been the kind of person that goes up and down in weight. I am in one of my moods again, where I am tired of looking and feeling like a couch potato. I would like to re-join Curves For Women. I was a member some years back and I really enjoyed it. Unfortunately at the time I couldn't afford the monthly fee. Hoping I will be able to squeeze it into my budget. I am trying to push the plate away before the plate is empty. I always drink lots of water, but maybe I should drink nothing but for the most part. I HAVE to have my coffee in the morning, and I am fond of the Rummacoka. I know, I know. Alcohol is nothing but empty calories. But I can't deprive myself of every enjoyment! My biggest downfall is sugar. I love the donuts, and chocolate, and cake and PIE! Oh how I love pie.

Now that the holidays are behind us for another 11 months, I don't have temptation staring me in the face everyday. I have been planning on bringing my Thighmaster to work for some time now, and this morning I finally remembered. (Yes I still have a Thighmaster, thank you Susan Somers LOL.) I have found in the past that it really works. I sit at a desk much of the day, so I figure no one will be able to see what i am doing under there. LOL. Anyway, wish me luck.

Mozartballs

Friday night is the private screening party for the film documentary "Mozartballs". I am so excited. Not JUST because my dearest friend, Steph and his wife, Lynette are the featured cast, but also because they really do throw the best parties. He posted his gastronimic itinerary on his blog this morning and it looks like quite the feast! Also, since moving to Stillwater, I have made so many new friends. Dr. Scott will be there. He is a professor of music history at OSU. Also, another friend I met only recently. His name is Jaeson and he is an old friend of Lynette's from high school. Of course Beau will be with me and another new edition to my friendship repertoire, Lashell. I met Lashell last July when I started my job at Express Personnel. We became fast friends and I think we will be for our lifetimes. Yeah, she's a keeper.

Anyway, after living virtually alone for 6 months last Fall/Winter, it's so nice to be able to make plans!!! Yay! It's a party.